The above is a pretty accurate description of the way my flatmate and I planned our recent trip.
Our home-gal was on a year abroad, doing one of those sweet degrees which get you a free year long holiday. This is bitchin' because it means we had a free holiday house. And, like, staying with other students means being drunk, coming home late and watching catfish all day instead of "enjoying cultural activities". So I was super lucky to have a rad place to stay, totally free.
If you don't know the right people, I guess you could hostel, or
couchsurf, or camp, or just sleep in train stations like some
happy hitchers I know. But, srsly, get on meeting foreigners, befriending them and abusing their sofas.
Holiday adventures: £160
I enjoyed most of the things I managed to squeeze in. Obvs every budget is different, and there will be different interests and priorities but here is some good and bad stuff to waste your money on:
Stuff to Do:
*All of this stuff is pretty cheap. Or free.
Drink by the river
Unlike the UK, where drinking a bottle of supermarket alcohol next to a river would be fairly questionable, in
Wien it's totes chill. There are some super trendy beach bars by the Danube. Like, someone decided "you know what Vienna needs? A beach." and then they went and poured sand out on the floor and stuck some deckchairs there. This worked for some reason, and although the bars are packed, its also legit to just sit next to them with your own alcohol, and spend €2.50, rather than €4.50, on a beer. Groovy.
Hang out in gardens and pretend to be a princess. Or pretend a pigeon is a princess. Whatevs.
The
Schonbrunn Gardens are 100% free, and really pretty to walk around in, and just chill and chat. There is also a maze and zoo, which cost money, and you could do them if you like, but you don't need to when there is such a crazy beautiful palace to look at! Or, like us guys you could spend an hour watching the devil squirrels and a pigeon. Your life, your choice.
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| Devil squirrels |
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| Princess Cici the pigeon |
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| aMAZEing |
Go swimming.
Swimming in the Danube is super fun, as long as you don't consider the grossness of swimming in an actual river. Its also full of like minded teenagers, getting drunk on pedalos and sunbathing. (Assuming you go in the summer). There are a ton of cafes and bars near the swimming spot too, although not many were actually open, which is weird, as it was peak season. Another thing to note: Vienna gets HOT. And I mean 40 degrees hot, not London hot. Was. Not. Prepared.
But it makes swimming totally beachy and lush.
Get ice cream.
Ice cream is good wherever you are, especially in a city where every building looks like an icecream.
Hang with cats, because people suck.
There is a cute little cat cafe in Vienna,
Cafe Neko. Its such a relaxing place, and its only around €3 for a drink, which gives you unlimited time with the cats. Not that the cats really want strokes, they're all stroked out and want to sleep and run away from visitors. But still, its fun to waste away an hour or two around cats. Even though the idea of actually eating anything there grosses me out!
Go to a gallery in a palace.
The ultimate 2 4 1 sightseeing deal. Nailed it.
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| Belvedere Gardens |
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| Belvedere Palace gallery |
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| Klimt - The Lovers |
Stuff not to do:
I spent money on this stuff, and would recommend you pick up a couple of extra tinnies..
Go to a hipster club
I wouldn't advise a night out to Grelle Forelle, despite it being
pretty well recommended. Firstly, there are no hipsters in Vienna, so they're off to a bad start. But I think my dislike of this club stems from a wider dislike of clubs that think that they have to play house music to be cool. I get that some people like house, but to be a hipster these days, one has to hang out in a hard-to-find, mysterious club, under a car park, that plays electronic bleeping until 6am. That's so not much fun. Unless you're on drugs.
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| getting lost looking for hipsters |
However, the tiiiiny crowd (which was pretty happenin' for a Vienna night I was told) didn't act like their eyes were vibrating from the insides. In fact, the smoking area was busiest, which is great if you need a club wristband to overcome your inhibitions about talking to new people, but not great for any kind of vibe. And the drinks were expensive.
Take your dogs to bark at the cats.
As I mentioned, I found the cat cafe relaxing, and amusing in its own right. However, the people of Vienna obviously want more excitement in their lives, and, that comes from walking your frenzied dog right up to the window of Cafe Neko, to terrify the cats. (This happened a couple of times just in our one visit!) Okay, okay, some people are 'dog people' but this is too far. Let sleeping cats lie and all that...
Cross the road like a normal person
Cars don't stop at zebra crossings. The zebra crossings are just there to trick you. Giant zebras everywhere, that are seemingly purposeless.
Miss the ball season.
Balls are still a thing. They still happen, and they are still fabulous, so I'm told. Obviously, our flight was the week after the ball season ended. Gutted.
Other stuff to think about when travelling is, of course:
Food €20 approx.
Obviously go to a supermarket. Even budget European cheese and ham is fancy compared to Sainos basics here in the UK.
Also, judging by the one meal we did have out, the food in Vienna isn't all that.
We ate at
Café europa, a place famous for still serving food late into the night. Personally, if I was after a midnight snack, a rock hard burger < schnitzel. Or kebab, or cheese fries....or just a decent burger.
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| schnitzel. or squished fried ham. |
Transport: €20 approx. (or free if you're smart...)
Okay, I can't remember what I actually paid, but I had a daily budget of €20 and remember getting pretty feared about spending my first days drinking money on a frikin' U Bahn Weekly Travel card... before I realised that it actually worked out at about €5 per day. Cheaper than
TFL so can't complain.
But you're an idiot if you buy one as they don't ever check these things. My friend was there for a whole year and only got checked on her last day. The irony.
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| Pole dancing by the rathaus |
Verdict on Vienna:
My overall verdict on Vienna is that it's a charming place to visit. Its totally fancy, and there is so much ridiculous Baroque that you feel like you're in the Sims. On a £300 budget its pretty fun, you can suck up the atmosphere, and experience stuff that you wouldn't in London. For a city break its way more relaxing than I expected, and you should totally check it if you're in Europe.
Auf Wiedersehen xxox
